I know I’m not alone here, but I am both stressed and grateful due to our financial predicament. It’s hard to shut off the calculating section of my brain. I can’t stop thinking about what we can and can’t afford. And when I realize we aren’t going to make it, something comes along and saves us. That’s the amazing part.
While my husband was going to college this summer, he wasn’t able to do his second job. Actually, they didn’t even have any work for him, so I guess the timing was perfect, except for the fact that we weren’t going to have what we needed. Just in time, I was given the opportunity to make a little extra, barely allowing us to cover our bills.
Then school started and the supply lists were larger than ever. Not only did they expect a lot – they expected name brand items, including a package of colorful Sharpies for my second grader. Do I want my son playing with permanent pens? So much for his clothes. And now they want reams of copy paper, Clorox wipes, dry erase markers, and one teacher wanted four large boxes of Kleenex per child. Times that by three children and I was stressing hard. My mom was wonderful and went to buy the majority of what we needed. I hate being the needy one, but I hope I will be in the position soon to help others. I still do what I can, but it doesn’t feel like much.
Again, our bills are approaching and I was starting to worry and I feel like I’m going to have a panic attack when I’m grocery shopping. Our dollar just doesn’t stretch as much as it used to. But my husband was just assigned to a new area with more opportunities for overtime. Last week he worked 4 and yesterday he worked 3. He will probably work another 3 tomorrow.
These mini miracles are combined with our hard work and we’re making it. I’m cooking a lot from scratch, making my own cleaning supplies, and laundry detergent.
My faith is being tested again and the Lord is proving that we will be taken care of. I want to learn to relax instead of constantly worrying. I want to enjoy my life no matter what is going on, but it’s so hard to have faith when you’re not sure where your next meal will come from. I thought we would never have to live through this again.
It’s a hard time for so many people right now. I pray for improvement for all of us.
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