Mormon Bloggers

I’m experiencing my yearly Christmas sadness and the following is going through my mind:

I don’t want to say goodbye to the Christmas lights and music.

Did I do enough for people?

Did I set my expectations too high?

Do I really need all this stuff and where am I going to put it?

Will we still be in this apartment next year?  I hope not.  On the other hand, this has been our home for 7 years and most of our memories are here.  Three newborn babies have entered this home.  It will be sad to leave.  This may have been our last Christmas here.  Did we savor it enough?  Were we grateful enough to have a home at all or did we spend the season resenting everything we don’t have?  I have so many mixed feelings about this place.

Did we spend our money foolishly and should we have saved more for groceries?

Was our Christmas Christ centered enough?

I will miss Stake Choir and wish it could happen all year long.

Why is my kids’ Winter vacation going so quickly?  It’s already half over and I want them home with me.  I hate that I get so little time with them during the week and the rest of that time is mostly hectic with dinner to make, homework to do, and activities to drive children to.  The break felt longer when I was a kid.  Maybe it was longer?

Once again, I feel like we didn’t do enough for my in-laws who live far away and it’s been three years since we have seen them.  This is so depressing to me and I feel bad for my husband.  I think it doesn’t feel like Christmas to him because he doesn’t get to be with his family.  I am lucky to be close to mine.

Last year our rent went up right after Christmas.  Will this happen again?

In a little over a month, it will be time to work on our taxes and once again, I’m terrified even though we have never owed.

My son’s birthday is in a little more than month.  Will it be a good day for him?  Will I be stressing as hard as I am now?

Now I’m reminding myself that I feel this way every year and I’m usually over it in a few days, even happy to get my house back in semi-order.  I’m also free to enjoy the Christmas tree for a while longer without worrying about buying the perfect gift for everyone.

 How was your Christmas?  Do you feel disappointed when it’s over too?